Sunday, November 22, 2009
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
The leaves have barely started changing, but the grasses are dying off.
Tomorrow is my second therapy session. I feel ambivalent. I've had bad experiences in the past, so I'm not really a fan. I'm looking for major issues. My current therapist did some things that are pet-peeves of mine, but didn't do anything overtly horrible, homophobic, assumptive, or wrong (yes, I've had that kind of negative therapy experience). I don't really want to go, but it's that "I don't want to do anything after work but go home and read/hang out with Lou/be at home" not wanting to go, not the usual "therapy is torture and I would rather be trapped in a room full of tarantulas" sort of not wanting to go. I suppose that's a step in the right direction.
Oh! I fell down the stairs tonight. And landed on my ass. Which I've just had surgery on. That was awesome. Ouch.
Friday, September 25, 2009
I can't wait to be up & about and feeling better. The pain meds are making me loopy in a way I don't like and I'm tired of being stuck in the house. I actually WANT to go grocery shopping with Lou later. We'll see.
More soon. With "real" photos.
Monday, September 21, 2009
Oh, and a few non-fall-related photos...
And now on to the whining. I am REALLY afraid of anesthesia. Like... I go into every procedure certain I'm going to die. That kind of afraid. The same feeling I get when I'm boarding a plane. I'm having trouble sleeping because I'm preoccupied with it. I know it will be ok in that part of my mind that has the ability to be rational, but that is only PART of my mind. The other part, the crazy, irrational, freak-out-at-the-sight-of-a-needle part... well... that's pretty much the predominant part of my brain right now.
Also? I'm afraid of pain medications. I don't know why, but I'm terrified to take them, and usually don't. I have narcotics sitting around my house from dental work I had years ago. I didn't take a single pill when I had my wisdom teeth out this year.
Which all leads me to ask, "Why am I crazy?" Seriously.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
There's been a lot going on in ol' West Philly. Lou & I had a giant home repair to contend with this summer, and are now undertaking a second repair (this one DIY and far less expensive, but far more time-consuming and probably equally stressful.) I've been plagued with a weird, painful, and embarrassing health issue, and am having surgery on Thursday. I've been having problems since mid-July, and after several attempts at medical treatment, surgery is the only option. I'm terrified of needles, of doctors, of anesthesia... needless to say, I'm freaking the hell out over here. Even worse? It involves my butt. Yarg. My BUTT!
Aside from that, I've been ok. I've been running since June. My illness has curtailed this a bit (I have good days and bad days), but I haven't quit. I HAVE quit wearing shoes, though. Instead, I've been swept up into the barefoot running philosophy. After years of trying to run in fancy sneakers and having shin splints, knee pain, and lower back pain, I talked to some friends, did some research, read Born to Run, and decided to buy myself some funny foot gloves.
Because of my illness (I've had a low-grade fever this whole time and felt generally run-down because of the persistent infection, as well as having some pain on and off) I've been sidetracked and have only been managing a few miles here and there, but still, I'm running. Hopefully after my surgery, I'll be able to pick it up and add distance and frequency. In fact, I know I will, because I'll be feeling well.
I also started therapy this week, which was... interesting. I'm iffy about therapy. I've had some pretty bad experiences in the past, but I'm going to give it a try. It would be nice to combat my anxiety, deal with some of my weird compulsive behaviors (like collecting hundreds of lip balms and pens--What? Why am I a freak?), and generally feel more confident.
But anyhow, all 18 of you who read this... I'm still out here. I can't promise to blog all the time, but I'll promise to try harder. I think I need the outlet.
Oh, and KITTY!
Bella is a recently-adopted shelter kitten who has the genetic mutation of an American Curl. Barf-ily cute.
I'll write again soon. I think.
Saturday, July 4, 2009
I finally got around to setting up my mobile and email profile for Blogger on my new phone, so it's likely there will be several phone posts for the time being. When I'm ready to pull out my camera and start working again, I will.
For now, this will have to suffice. I'm here, I'm ok (better than ok, or at least working my way to better) and I'll be back in full force soon.
Oh, and Lemmy says hello.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
A while back, someone who reads this blog asked me to post photos of my bike. I actually think one of my first posts had a few (much better than this crappy cellphone shot), but here she is this morning. That's my "parking spot" at work.
Two of the kittens have eye infections. Getting eye meds into those tiny little squirmy faces is so hard! Mom is also on to me: she's on oral antibiotics and was twice as hard to medicate this morning than yesterday. I feel this does not bode well.
Ok, work. Photos from my camera in the next two days.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Had a wonderful ride in today, despite having to bike down Chesnut into Center City. (That road is scary to ride. No bike lanes for part and drivers go 50mph. )
Final exam tonight, then... Hopefully my anxiety level will go down. I don't even know why I'm anxious about this, I guess just because it'a looming.
Hoping to plan an evening bike ride with Lou one night this week or this weekend. I had fun last weekend, despite the fact that we were in over our heads a bit. I felt better. I even went for a jog last night!
Cutest thing ever: L giggling in her sleep last night. Sigh.
I'm going to try to use my real camera and put up a real post soon, but cellphone posts are all I've got right now.
Monday, May 11, 2009
Saturday, May 9, 2009
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Yeah. THAT happened last week. And we refinanced our house. And our roommates are moving out next weekend.
Lots going on.
So a few weeks ago, we had several days of rain in a row. I'm running around before work visiting kitties, and I get a phone call. Yet another cat has seen the giant "sucker" sign L wears and has begun to follow her down the street. A pregnant tortishell cat with extra toes. Sort of like our dream cat, really.
Skip to last Tuesday, when she has five kittens in our spare room. Unbearable cuteness.
So that's the cat situation. We've got five kittens on our second floor. Eight days old today. Severe cuteness overload.
We refinanced our house and locked in at a ridiculously low rate. That happened Monday, after some frustrating holdups brought on by the bank. It was a cause of stress for a while, but it's over now, and we're thrilled to save that money every month, especially since the roomies will be leaving so soon.
Brewing obsession continues. Have a pale ale in bottles for next weekend and a stout in the fermenter for... well, a few months from now, probably.
I was really excited to find a stout in this cool flip-top bottle.
So, life's been a little busy lately. Stress, tiny miracles, lots of rain (which makes for happy plants but cranky people). That about sums it up for now.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
A green blur of truck...
I have a thing about hydrants. I think I've mentioned this before.
I always forget I work so close to this Church... and the convent attached to it. And the funeral home attached to my building. Things that scare me, indeed.
Tater has taken to sleeping between us in the last few months. That's L's arm she's using as a pillow. So cute. Not from my morning walk, obviously.
I've been feeling overwhelmed and tired all the time lately. I think the main issue is that we're waking up around 5:15 most mornings because of L's new (well, not THAT new anymore) schedule. Try as I might, I can't adjust. And this week, I was busy worrying about a paper I had to write, which was making it hard for me to fall asleep.
My goal for the rest of this week, now that the paper has stopped eating my life, is to edit photos from the weekend, brew another batch of beer, and actually sleep at night. We'll see how much of that I get done.
Hopefully I'll have something other than cell shots in the next few days.
Sunday, April 5, 2009
We've had some crazy weather lately. Friday afternoon it rained, then became gorgeous and sunny, then rained some more. There was a rainbow over our house (which of course dissipated before I could get outside with my camera). Then there was just rain. Then it was sunny and beautiful again. Ah, spring.
I bottled my first batch of beer Wednesday evening. It involved some cursing and a lot of splashing beer on the floor, the cabinets, and the stove. I wussed out on capping bottles and ended up putting about half the batch into growlers. After all the bottling drama, I invested in a better siphon and read up on the right way to do things. Hopefully, the next batch won't involve as much angst. This batch will be ready for drinking in another week or two. I'm pretty excited. (Batch #2 is going to be way more complicated and involve a lot more aging, so I'll be doing another simple batch in-between. I am hooked on homebrewing already, and I haven't even tasted my beer!)
My insane dog. She's attempted to throw herself into oncoming traffic twice this weekend. WTF, dog? As I type this, she's curled up behind me snoring her stupid head off. Why is my dog so crazy? WHYYY?
Ok, I'm off to eat pancakes and do dishes. Then I think I'll try to convince L to do something outdoorsy. I'm feeling really down and need to combat that somehow... I'm thinking a long walk or bike ride should do the trick.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Monday, March 16, 2009
This couch sympathizes.
I'm getting back into the swing of things. Biking daily, lugging my camera around with me, attempting to get some semblance of momentum started. Trying to live every day awake and aware, not just waiting for whatever happens next.
This is not easy.
It's hard to get caught in the cycle of waiting for the next thing: the weekend, tomorrow, the day I'll have this or that thing. It's hard to love the day you're having, and to live it as fully as you can.
Somehow, humans are the only creatures I know who have trouble living in the now.
Warm laundry brings Agnes great joy. I'm a little jealous.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Those tulips I was so excited about on my last post? Covered in snow.
...gave way to the spring-like warmth of the weekend. We opened the windows, to the immense delight of the cats.
The Cap'n loves her some curtains.
Of course that's all over now. It's cool/cold (depending on who you ask) out there again, and overcast. I'm enjoying the fact that the streets are clear of ice and snow and I can ride my bike again. I feel much less crazy when I can stretch my legs a bit.
Saturday, February 28, 2009
But we're getting closer.
I'm getting really antsy for the warm weather. Today, L and I went to the bike store to get her a folder bike (her new commute is a bit of a hike, even using public transportation). Being around bikes and gear makes me want to ride more! For fun! I finally got back into the grind with bike commuting this week, but no more than to and from work (about 7 miles a day.) I'm hoping to do a few longer rides a week this spring.
L's new bike? Way cool. And orange. I'm in love with it, in a nerdy sorta way. Maybe some day she'll let me take pictures of her with it. L + orange foldy bike = adorable.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Monday, February 23, 2009
I swore I'd do something after work today, but it didn't happen. I came home from work with throbbing toothache and tons of reading to finish, and I ended up crashing for an hour or so. My tooth still hurts and I've got a "nap hangover." I wish I'd taken my dog for a walk or to the park. I'm a bum.
Friday, February 20, 2009
Change. Bus shelter with bus reflected.
I commuted by Septa a few nights last week. Too tired/sick from wisdom tooth surgery to bike, Lou needed the car. It's actually not so bad; I used to get really motion sick on buses, but not so these last few times. Nice. I can read news, listen to music, and totally let someone else get me home. I like.
Anne, this is a weird photo just for you:
Orville making an amazing face while eating.
And I'm off. The Wii has stolen my life.
Monday, February 16, 2009
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
My apologies to the three people who await fresh posts from me. I'll try to get with the program.
This is a self-portrait? Do you see me? that black blob on the left of the spigot part of the fountain? Yep, that's me, procrastinating on my walk to work. I was mesmerized by the colors of the playground and the fountain's chrome (ooh, shiny!!) finish. So neat and clean; it stands in direct opposition with the way I see the city of Philadelphia as a whole. Which is to say I think Philly is treated as one giant trashcan by half the residents, the infrastructure is crumbling, and in general it's really f-ing dirty. But this park is well-maintained (because it's new and in an affluent area, I'd assume) and it's still bright and shiny.
A nail and moss on the outside of the Eastern State Penitentiary.
A continuation of the moss theme, this time with a bright blue pipe. This is on the front of a house in the Fairmount area. I love blues and greens, the brighter the better. Also, as usual, the more crumbly and pathetic, the better.
L plus bearsuit plus Jelly.
L's mom gave us the most amazingly comfortable sweatshirts. They're unbelievably warm and snugly. They have thumb holes which keep the sleeves pulled up over your knuckles, they're lined with a wool-like fleece, and the hoods zip over your neck and chin. We've dubbed them our "bearsuits," and we wear them around the house whenever it's cold. My bearsuit is the most comforting piece of clothing I've ever had, I think. I'm contemplating wearing it on Thursday when I go to the
I have a friend going with me, and L's taking the afternoon off to take care of me once I get home. I should relax; I've got my bases covered. Instead, I've been losing sleep over this thing. Silly, I know, because I've gone through oral surgery twice before, and feel like I should know the routine by now. The needle is the worst part, and it's over in two minutes. The actual surgery? Gross, noisy, and a little scary, but not painful. I don't know why I can't overcome my innate panicky feelings over this whole thing and just chill out, but I can't.
Eh, such is life. It'll be over in less than 48 hours, and I'll be on here whining about how my mouth hurts and how much indigestion I've gotten from eating nothing but ice cream.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Do I get a free psychic reading if I buy a soft pretzel? 'Cuz that'd be pretty cool.
Not the best photo, but the best thing! Imagine how awesome it would be if they had a "buy one, get one" deal! To be quite honest, I'd be a little afraid to get a psychic reading. I'd fear dire predictions, like on "Lost" when the psychic tells Claire all that creepy stuff about her unborn child. Nevermind, I'll just take the pretzel. (With extra-spicy brown mustard, please.)
After class, I pretty much immediately realized that I was in pain. For a day or two (or three) before, I'd become acutely aware of the fact that one of my bottom wisdom teeth was on its way in. No big deal, I thought. It would be my third wisdom tooth to come in, and the other ones were fine. (Were, not are, because I got a cavity in one and ended up having it pulled.) But the point is that having them arrive hasn't been a problem in the past, and my dentists have never suggested otherwise.
It turns out I need this one out. I had a terrible infection that caused me to lose a night of sleep and a day of work. And now, I get to lose at least two, if not all three, of my remaining wisdom teeth. Awesome.
Even better? Lemme tell you about my week next week: on Monday, I have jury duty. Again. I am one of those lucky people who gets called every year. You can ask my girlfriend (who never seems to get called); I'm totally cursed. If you have a good reason for me to give about why I shouldn't serve on a jury, now's the time.
Ok, so then, I have work Tuesday and Wednesday (provided I don't get called to serve on some crazy case.) Good. Work. Money. This will be the highlight of my week.
Thursday, I get to have oral surgery! Yay! I'm so pleased! My sadistic singing oral surgeon will vacillate between making gruff comments about my extreme anxiety and singing (yes, I said singing) "don't be afraid, this won't hurt" in operatic style. Did I mention he's tall, muscular, and has a military haircut? I dare not rebel. I'll just stare at the ornate opera mask framed on his wall (gay, gay, gay) and suffer my fate.
Next week is probably not going down in my "Top Ten Best Weeks Ever" list. Not unless Lou buys me a pony or something.
The only reason I'm not in the fetal position in the bathtub right now.
Ah, the sad collection of drugs keeping me alive. Not pictured? The amazing clay heat pack I microwave, insert into a purple sleeve, and strap to my face. That thing is amazing (though not really great for the ol' social life.)
Oh, did I mention I pulled my butt muscle? Yeah... Ouch.
Another spigot. Apparently, I can add them to my list of things I obsess over a bit. Locks, look out. You've got competition.
Uh... I bring you a random spigot. I just liked the way the green rust contrasted with the red brick. And I'm just tired of bitching about my stupid ailments.